This gave me confidence to start researching midwives in my area within a few days of returning home. The first two websites that actually worked (some links didn’t work in my search), I thought “those look like nice women, I’ll consider them”. When I got to Sherri Price’s page, if the Spirit was possible of yelling, that is what happened. I heard a very loud “THAT IS YOUR MIDWIFE! THAT IS WHO NEEDS TO ATTEND YOUR NEXT BIRTH!!!!” Mind you, at this stage I wasn’t even trying to conceive yet. I was just researching the possibility of a homebirth. But after that very strong impression, I knew that not only was research over, but it was no longer an “if I have a homebirth” it was “I will be birthing this baby at home with this particular midwife.”
A couple of months later I got pregnant and around 8 weeks I was so severely dehydrated and nauseated that I ended up having a vasal vagal syncope – something I hadn’t experienced in over 8 years. It was a very scary time to be pregnant and have a vasal vagal syncope and the thought “perhaps I should have my baby at the hospital” crossed my mind. Throughout the second trimester, every time I considered calling my OB’s office and planning a hospital birth, I felt uneasy. Logic would tell me it was “safer” to birth my baby at the hospital with a doctor and medical equipment, but my spirit/intuition (or my “gut”) was telling me to birth at home with my midwife team. Oddly enough, this experience of debating between birthing at home with my midwife, or birthing at the hospital with my OB, was VERY similar to an experience I had had nine years previously. I had been told, in very specific terms, that I would marry Marc after returning home from my 18 month LDS mission. Marc and I had been writing for just over 2 years at this point and we had never met in person. My Logic (and family members) told me that I should date him in person before making that decision. But the Spirit kept telling me that it was the right decision to marry Marc even though we had never been in the same room together. Because of the doubt we had received from family members on both sides during our “engagement” period, we only told a few family members that we were planning a home birth. Marc’s mother was totally supportive of it since she had birthed Marc at home. My mother was VERY hesitant and it took a few months of me sharing with her how I felt anxiety when I thought about birthing at a hospital this time around but I felt PEACE when I thought about birthing at home before she stopped feeling anxiety for me.
|My copy of the book, which arrived exactly one month before my birthday and 7 days before my daughter decided to start the process of her birth.|
|This is one reason I wish we had hired a doula for our first child's birth. This counter-pressure technique would have come in handy for that labor!|
|In between contractions I was telling the midwives and our photographer Susan how Marc and I "met", realized we were supposed to get married after my mission and then met in real life.|
|The push that finally got her head down.|
|The final push.|
|One of the many times they were suctioning mucus out of her airways. The tubing is oxygen. It was a good thing that Sherri also called Roxanna to come because while Sherri and Angie were taking care of me, Roxanna was working on Cassie.|
|Sleeping sister and big brother|
|Getting a closer look at baby sister.|
I like to say that since Marc was born at home, she wanted to have that in common with her daddy.
|First time holding Cassie|
|Wearing her daddy's "Born At Home" shirt 31 years after he did (she is almost 4 months old in this picture since that is when I came across this shirt Marc's mother had given to us).|
I learned from those grief chapters what NOT to say to a grieving parent and what to DO for a grieving mother. I think the sensitivity I gained from this book has helped strengthen our friendship. I felt more confidence in mentioning Kale in our conversations rather than being afraid to talk about him in an effort to protect her emotions as I may have done before reading the chapters in this book that dealt with mourning the loss of a child. He is not a taboo subject when we are together.
*Edited to update Katy Rawlins' Treasure Valley Midwives profile from the "Student" page to the "Midwives" page.